Great Expectations

A few weeks ago I came across a quote that sums up most of my days - and I think a lot of others' as well: "What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it is supposed to be." Now I have always been one to take words and run with them, simply because words are one of my favorite things in this world. I left that out of my last post - I love words. They have such power and when used the right way it's incredible what they can do. My greatest desire in life is to inspire with my words, at least one person. If I can do that, I think everything else will sort of fall into place.

That last sentence, that's exactly what I'm talking about. I have this picture in my head of how things will be if I just accomplish this, or that, or the other thing. It's not true. Well, it might be...but I don't know that for sure. I am such a control freak that if things don't follow this yellow brick road I've laid down in front of me, my world falls apart. Absolutely nothing lately has fallen on my predetermined path. But what I'm figuring out is that MY predetermined path isn't the same as the predetermined path I've already been given.

I've realized recently that I'm a manipulator. Not necessarily in the worst sense of the word, but I twist and turn things all the time to be what I want them to be. Most of the time my manipulation is completely wrong - my imagination is one hell of a creature, let me tell you. And it's something I need to stop. I have to remind myself every day. I tattooed the symbol for no worries on myself as a reminder that I CAN'T CONTROL EVERYTHING. Most days it is the most difficult thing I have to do all day. Stats, Macro, Accounting tests all in one week - piece of cake. Not manipulating, controlling, or worrying - next to impossible. But NOT impossible. We need reminders all the time. To someone who I hope reads this, too, LET IT BE. If it's on your body chances are you need the reminder.

I write all of this down and think about it so much and share it with all of you because as much as it helps me, I hope it helps you, too. Let it go, let it be, que sera, sera. I work on it every day.

xx
Gina